Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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