please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
