Dual....:-)
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Randomize
