Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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