So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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