Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
