do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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