come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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