Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
he shaved USA in his pubs
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
