I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize