sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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