found the other keg... it's in the tree
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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