I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize