But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
