Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize