Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
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