chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
