Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
