help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize