Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
