So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
