So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
