Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
