Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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