There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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