But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
