yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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