you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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