Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
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