please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
