I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize