is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
