my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
