Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
