That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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