Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
