Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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