For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
