I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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