Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
