was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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