We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Come share oat with me in your robe
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
