One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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