come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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