Don't you send me to vm
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Barsexuality is the new black.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Randomize
