that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
