THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize