Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
