We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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