Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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